67 Ways NOT To Sell A Car

If you don't much about selling cars or car care in general here are 67 ways NOT to sell a car. [via manvsdebt]

  1. Don’t worry when a little rust starts to form.
  2. Don’t wash the outside of the car. First impressions don’t matter.
  3. Don’t pick up trash from the back seat of the car. Who rides in the back seat?
  4. Clean the car, but don’t detail it.
  5. Don’t bother checking the fluid levels. Who cares about oil, brake fluid, and power steering?
  6. Don’t fix minor interior problems, such a knobs, switches, and vents.
  7. Don’t bother with adding an air-freshner.
  8. Let your pets have free reign over the car.
  9. Don’t worry about touching up paint.
  10. Don’t bother cleaning out the trunk. Instead assume they won’t pop it open.
  11. Add the 16th bumper sticker to your collection.
  12. Continually smoke in your car up until the day you sell.
  13. Don’t replace old, worn out floor mats.
  14. Let your kids eat food in the car. Would you like fries with that?
  15. Assume waxing your vehicle is over-rated.
  16. Sell your car to a dealer without checking the private party market.
  17. Don’t bother with keeping maintenance records. Everyone will take your word.
  18. Don’t mention that your car has been totaled… twice.
  19. Don’t bother paying off the title even if you’re able.
  20. Only advertise in one medium.
  21. Don’t bother with free online listings. They take too long and people hate the internet.
  22. Clean the car, but ignore the tires/rims. No one ever looks at the size or condition of tires.
  23. Don’t bother to check the air in all the tires.
  24. Don’t replace broken headlights. You can just sell it during the day.
  25. Don’t replace broken windshield wipers. You can sell it on a sunny day.
  26. Let people test drive your car alone.
  27. Tell everyone your reason for selling is “Time to move on from this one.”
  28. Print fliers in black and white.
  29. Forget to mention you’ve been the only owner.
  30. Grant a discount, because it’s “all the cash they have on them”.
  31. Put “Or Best Offer” on every ad.
  32. Forget to mention any other calls or appointments you may have.
  33. Sell your 4-wheel drive in the spring, right after all the snow melts away.
  34. Sell your rear-wheel drive convertible in November.
  35. Donate your car to charity without first testing the local market, solely for the tax write-off.
  36. Start your price slightly above-market, just in case. That works well for homes, too.
  37. Advertise your price as $13,000 instead of $12,900, even if you’re willing to take $12,000.
  38. Don’t bother getting that clicking noise looked at. Buyers probably won’t notice it.
  39. Don’t worry about a physical “For Sale” sign.
  40. Forget to mention that you are selling your car to family and friends.
  41. Have an annoying ring-back tone on the number you place in the ads. Everyone likes Soulja Boy.
  42. Don’t screen buyers by phone. Just put your address directly in the ad.
  43. Ignore how you look when you meet potential buyers to show the car.
  44. Sell your car on payments.
  45. Answer the question, “What’s the lowest you’ll take?”
  46. Just sign over the title, without checking your state laws. Isn’t that what Uncle Earl always does?
  47. Forget to look over the glove compartment and trunk one last time.
  48. Don’t cancel your insurance after selling the car.
  49. Don’t study the local market. Kelley Blue Book conquers all.
  50. Post an ad without any pictures.
  51. Ignore all calls from numbers you don’t know hoping they will leave a voicemail.
  52. Be the first to throw out a price once negotiations start.
  53. Accept a personal check as payment.
  54. Underestimate the leverage of an official car history report.
  55. Rush the buyer when he is looking over the car.
  56. Lose a deal over $50, with very little other prospects.
  57. Don’t list all of the obvious issues with the car in the ads.
  58. Over-promise, under-deliver.
  59. Don’t thoroughly include all the details and features. Who cares about power-windows?
  60. Fail to explicitly state that “car is sold as is” and definitely don’t get that in writing anywhere.
  61. List your car on Monday night. The weekend is usually too convenient for people.
  62. Wait until the last minute to sell your car.
  63. Don’t worry about getting seat covers for damaged interior.
  64. Lie about known problems. These things never come around.
  65. Lack knowledge of your car’s gas mileage.
  66. Grow attached to a particular buyer and forget you always have the option of walking away.
  67. Once the sale is complete, sport the Happy Dance in full view of the buyer.
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