Top 10 Songs I Can Never Listen To The Same Way Again

Song: "Trust", by Prince
Reason: Parade float scene, Batman (1989)
Not that I listened to this song all that much to begin with, but it still applies to the list. Tim Burton's Batman is a classic, but watching it after the recent wave of new age superhero movies makes you realize how completely ridiculous some of its scenes truly were. Heath may be always remembered as the creepiest Joker, but Jack is no doubt the silliest. The parade scene is by far the funniest part of the movie, and after seeing it a million times it's gotten to the point where if I even hear the interlude to Prince's "Trust" I'll picture that ridiculous clown balloon peeking around the street corner and immediately burst out laughing.

Song: "Bad Day", by Daniel Powter
Reason: RIP Keith Ledger Youtube Video
I still don't know the source of this internet-wide joke, but purposefully calling Heath Ledger "Keith Ledger" for the purpose of sending die hard fans into an anger frenzy doesn't seem like it will ever not be funny. Reading the mile-long list of angry Youtube comments over this video is even funnier with the 'sincere' background music playing, and now the piano interlude alone is enough to send me into a laughing fit.

Song: "O, Fortuna", by Carl Orff
Reason: Jackass: The Movie (2002)
I'm sure that if German composer Carl Orff knew his orchestral masterpiece (which was inspired by the deep, moving poetry of the 13th century) made people not think of the struggle of mankind, but rather Chris Pontius in a banana hammock, he could've died a happier man. The worst part is that this song and the opening/closing sequence match up so perfectly its almost like they were meant for each other. Someone needs to give that editor a medal.

Song: "Anyway You Want It", by Journey
Reason: "Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle (2003)
What an atrocity. Journey should bring up pleasant memories of drunken nights out at the bar on karaoke night, not Drew Barrymore pretending to act like a tough "I know karate!!!" secret agent. Playing great songs in awful movies should be a crime viewed on the same level as pit bull fighting. I couldn't find (read: didn't want to find) any clips of this movie with that song playing on the net, so just enjoy this clip instead. I think its infinitely better than any scene in that movie anyway.

Song: "Just What I Needed", by The Cars
Reason: Circuit City commercials
Nothing will kill a song you love faster than a repetitive beating in the form of awful commercials. Even now as we speak, some mattress company is probably buying the rights to "Enter Sandman" for their new line of commercials that are going to be spewed all over FX, Spike TV, or Lifetime to promote the sleepmaster 12000. It'll put you to sleep...hardcore!

Song: "Let's go outback tonight", by Outback Steakhouse
Reason: Incredibly inappropriate timing on is a great site. It would be nice if they had a bit more of a selection to choose from, but being able to watch TV and Movies for free on your comp is a solid deal and I really can't complain...except when it comes to the incredibly inappropriately timed commercials the website is obligated to throw your way during your viewing experience. If you've ever wondered how to cut the tension after a really graphic movie scene, like lets say, the eye-thumbout part of 28 Days Later, wonder no more! Just instantly fade to black and shove a bloomin' onion in the viewer's face with a cheery jingle. Case closed!

Song: "Down with the sickness", by Disturbed
Reason: Richard Cheese
Down with the sickness used to be a song that you could listen to with the volume so loud your ears would start bleeding and you wouldn't even care. Then along came Richard Cheese. His soothing lounge singing style could take a song written by satan himself and transform it into a jazzy toe tapper you could play for your own grandmother down at the old folks home. Sorry Disturbed, but it is catchy.

Song: "Gonna Fly Now", by Bill Conti
Reason: Baracky II
The early Rocky movies were great because they stood for something. Fighting against impossible odds, pushing yourself to the limit through sheer determination of will, and doing what you think is right in the toughest of situations. Not only that, the music composed by Bill Conti was awesome and really got you pumped up when you watched it. Baracky II just made the scene recently, and anyone who sees it will have the image of a jacked, black Hillary Clinton in a running on the beach montage with a jacked, white Barack Obama permanently burned into their brain. Every time you put on Rocky now, you will be instantly met with that mental image.

Song: "A Whole New World", by Alan Menken, Aladdin Soundtrack
Reason: Nick Patera
When you were a kid your agenda was made up of 3 routine activities: running around and screaming a lot, dressing up as your favorite Ninja Turtle, and watching Disney movies. Aladdin was truly a classic, but after watching this video of Nick's difficult to say. The look I had on my face while watching this video would be perfectly similar to the look on my face if anyone were to ever tell me that Megan Fox was actually a sweaty, 40 year old UPS delivery man who had been fooling everyone this whole time with an epic makeup disguise.

Song: "Dust in the Wind", by Kansas
Reason: Will Ferrell, Old School (2003)
Out of all the songs on the list, this one takes the cake by far. This sentimental acoustic piece has officially gone from the most respectful song to ever play at the funeral of a loved one to the most inappropriate of all time. Even if you were at your mother's open casket and this started playing, you'd start snickering imagining a fat, pasty and sweaty WIll Ferrell whaling "You're my boy, Blue!" in a cracking voice. God bless Hollywood.

Found this Post interesting? Discover more Curious Reads.
[via collegehumor]

More Post From The Web